Hit “Delete”: 2 Important Actions to Take Now if You Haven’t Already Done So


1. Delete All Using Contacts

You may think deleting old using contacts, including your dealer’s, is something to be done before quitting. If you can do any of this beforehand, great. But, for many of us, we can’t actually do these absolutely necessary actions until after we begin our recovery in full.

All those old using contacts need to be deleted. The dealers, the party buddies, the project tweakers. All erased so that you can’t retrieve them. And don’t forget to delete the phone numbers in your call history, as well.

2. Delete Social Media, Too

Sex hookup sites. Craigslist. Even Facebook for some. All social media that you employed in your using career needs to be deleted. If your Facebook is overwhelmed with using buddies, create a wholly new account and send friend requests only to your non-using friends. Then delete your old account altogether.

Putting your hookup sites on “hold” or merely adding “HELL NO” to drugs or “NO PNP,” is a slippery slope. It’s best to delete your old profile, with all your old buddy lists, at once. If you keep your old username and all the partying buddies on your favorite list, what’s the point?

If you are serious about your sobriety, you must delete your old “party” accounts. Don’t do this alone. Have a sober friend sit with you as you delete the accounts. Avoid the temptation to check the last emails and notices, just cancel your accounts altogether.

Only later, once you are many months into your recovery, or whenever you feel it’s right, create a new account as a sober person. State in your profile that you are “in recovery” and “absolutely no partying or drugs.” In short, give yourself some time away from the internet at the start of your quitting.

Nothing can take a person out quicker than an offer to party with a hot hookup. So don’t let it get that far. Avoid all social media that intersected with your using and create new accounts that are for your sober life and friends.

And When You Get a Call or Text from an Old Using Friend…

If for some reason you can’t change your number—and it needs to be a very good reason—here are some steps you can take:

Don’t answer any unrecognized number. Once you delete all your using contacts from your phone and computer, don’t answer any calls that come through with only a number identification—it’s probably an old using buddy. Let all unknown callers go to voice mail. Screen your calls.

Respond by texting only. So a using friend calls and leaves a message. Don’t call back and speak to them. Respond with a text. Something like: “I no longer party. It was affecting my health. I wish you well. Peace.” Keep it short, sweet, and do not invite a response. A side bar: I was surprised by the responses I got, even though I didn’t invite them. All, without exception, were supportive. “Good for you. Be well.” “I’ve tried but can’t just yet. I hope you can.” “Do it, buddy. Do it.” Why such positive and encouraging responses? Because in their heart of hearts, every tweaker wants to quit. Every one of us knows how deadly this drug is and where it will ultimately lead. It’s not universal, but in my experience it is overwhelming: most meth addicts, deep down inside, want to be rid of the demon. They just don’t believe it possible.

Delete incoming and outgoing phone and text histories. Don’t forget to delete any record of that call/text from your using friend. Be vigilant about this. You don’t want their number to be stored anywhere that you can find later. Remember to delete both incoming and outgoing histories. Thinking that you don’t have to delete this history is actually setting the stage for relapse. So hammer down that delete key and remember…

You CAN quit crystal meth.

And a side bar: unlike my advice to you above, after I got clean, I did keep in contact with one former person in my meth circle: my dealer. I loved the guy. He was one of the kindest and most decent human beings I knew, just lost in the darkness of meth. Due to a grateful intervention by the Los Angeles Police Department, he was forced to quit one month after I got clean myself. (I was with him, standing at his side, at his trial.) He is now one of my closest friends in recovery. Now, almost six years after his arrest, the records are expunged and he heads a design team for a major corporation you all would recognize. He is well respected by his coworkers and friends. His life is happy, joyous and free from meth. Sure, he regularly attends CMA and AA meetings to give back the gift of sobriety that was given to him. But the dark days of meth are years behind him. Remember, this was my dealer! Anything in recovery is possible.

Today if you decide to start the journey. Learning what to expect during the quitting process can be very helpful. Then not only are you prepared for what’s coming, but can find strategies to better maximize the possibility of truly quitting. I hope the above helps. Peace.